100 Great Quotes From Stargate: Atlantis
by DarthBetty
Summary: These are some of the funniest moments I could rememember and research. There will be 50 more coming soon.
1. 1 to 50

**1. ****Ford**: You know, we still haven't named the planet yet.  
**Sheppard**: I'm sure the Ancients have a name for it.  
**Ford**: How about Atlantica; something like that?  
**Sheppard**: I thought we agreed you weren't going to name anything anymore.

**2. ****SF #1**: Bacon.  
**SF #2**: The one thing you wish you'd brought with you is bacon.  
**SF #1**: It's the food that makes other food worth eating.  
**SF #2**: You wish you'd brought bacon to another galaxy.  
**SF #1**: Hey, you asked me what-

**3. ****Weir**: So the city would survive?  
**McKay**: Mm, I'd give us a better than 90-  
**Zelenka**: 70-  
**McKay**: 80 chance.  
**Weir**: Okay, so we should still evacuate.  
**McKay**: Yes, but not just because of Zelempka's pessimism-  
**Zelenka**: Zelenka.

**4. ****McKay**: Elizabeth, you take grounding station two. I'll take grounding station one. Major, you take stations three and four.  
**Sheppard**: Whoa whoa whoa, wait a second. Where are stations three and four?  
**McKay**: Here and here.  
**Sheppard**: And we are-  
**McKay**: Here. Yes. I need to get done quickly so I can start working on the subroutines, and Elizabeth was complaining about her knee the other day-  
**Sheppard**: Whoa whoa whoa, wait a second. Are these things even close to a transporter?  
**McKay**: Uh, yes, Elizabeth's is.  
**Sheppard**: And mine?  
**McKay**: Uh, it's a brisk walk away.  
**Sheppard**: And by "brisk" you mean "far."  
**McKay**: By "walk" I mean "run."

**Sheppard**: Okay.

**  
5. Sheppard**: I'm here.  
**McKay**: I told you to contact me when you go to the first one, Major.  
**Sheppard**: I _am_ at the first one, Rodney.  
**McKay**: Oh, sorry. I've already done mine.  
**Sheppard**: Oh, great. Good for you.  
**Weir**: Me, too.  
**Sheppard**: Good for everyone.  
**McKay**: Where are you now?  
**Sheppard**: I'm at the damn grounding station.  
**McKay**: No no no, not you.  
**Weir**: I'm in the transporter.  
**McKay**: There you are.  
**Weir**: There I am.  
**Sheppard**: Glad everybody's having such a good time.

**6. ****Teyla**: It would be better if I went alone.  
**Sheppard**: You will be alone... with Lt. Ford.

**7. ****McKay**: It's a command subroutine I've never seen before.  
**Zelenka**: What is its function?  
**McKay**: I don't know because I've never seen it before.

**8. ****Cowen:** We give thanks to our new friends.  
**Everyone:** We give thanks.  
**Cowen:** Please, eat.  
**McKay:** You don't think there's lemon in this, do you?  
**Ford:** I'm sure it's delicious.  
**McKay:** Have you seen someone in anaphylactic shock?  
**Ford:** Eat.

**9. ****Beckett**: It's not that I mind lending people a hand.  
**Sheppard**: No, of course not.  
**McKay**: You're a generous man, Carson.  
**Beckett**: But it's the principle of the thing, isn't it? You can't go and volunteering someone for something without consulting them first. That's not even volunteering, is it? It's being pressed into service.

**10. ****McKay**: No no no, he just doesn't like going through the Stargate.  
**Sheppard**: He's worse than Dr. McCoy.  
**Teyla**: Who?  
**Sheppard**: The TV character that Dr. Beckett plays in real life.

**11. ****Beckett**: Converting a human body into energy and sending it millions of light years through a wormhole. Bloody insanity.  
**McKay**: Come on, how often do you get to travel to an alien planet?  
**Beckett**: I was already _on_ an alien planet.

**12. ****Weir**: Major, have you made any progress with your prisoner?  
**Sheppard**: Not yet, but he just blinked.  
**McKay**: He blinked? What does that mean?  
**Sheppard**: It means he's still holding on, but he's indicated to me that he may break soon.  
**McKay**: And he indicated this to you by blinking?  
**Sheppard**: Yes.

**13. ****Weir**: What are our options?  
**McKay**: Well, let me see - we have slow death, quick death, painful death, cold lonely death...

**14. ****Caldwell**: Can we submerge the city again?  
**McKay**: It's a city, not a yo-yo.

**15. ****Beckett**: How come I never make friends like that?  
**McKay**: You need to get out more.  
**Beckett**: We're in another galaxy. How much more out can you get?

**16.**_ [ McKay is wearing an Ancient personal force field generator_  
**Weir**: I'm still trying to understand how you thought it was a good idea to test this device by having someone throw you off a balcony.  
**McKay**: Oh, believe me, that's not the first thing we tried.  
**Sheppard**[_Smug_ I shot him.  
[_Dr. Weir gives him "the look"_   
**Sheppard**: In the leg!  
**Dr. Rodney McKay**: I'm invulnerable!  
**Weir**: Aren't you the one who's always spouting off about how proper and careful scientific procedure must be adhered to?  
**Dr. Rodney McKay**[_Smug_ In-vul-nerable!

**17. ****Beckett**: He fainted.  
**McKay**: Oh there's gotta be a better word.  
**Beckett**: Faint is a proper medical term.  
**McKay**: I passed out from... manly hunger!

**18. ****McKay**: Using power... using power... using power.

**19. ****Sheppard**: Without inertial dampening, we'd be hit by so many g's, our eyes would pop, our skin would pull away from our faces, our brains would squish up to the back our skulls, and our internal organs would be crushed into these chairs. What about that sandwich?

**20. ****McKay**: I built an atomic bomb for my grade six science fair exhibit.  
**Ford**: They let you do that up in Canada?

**21. ****McKay**: What is it you said they grow here anyway?  
**Teyla**: Many things, but they are best known for a bean known as Tava.   
**McKay**: Java?  
**Sheppard**: Tava!

**22. ****McKay**[_the team is trying to come up with a solution to a problem while being very short on time_ You're right. If only we had a magical tool that could slow down time. I foolishly left mine on Earth - did you bring yours?  
**Zelenka**: You know, you're not pleasant when you're like this, McKay.  
**McKay**: I'm always like this.  
**Zelenka**: My point exactly.

**23. ****Weir**: The city can handle that?  
**McKay**: Yes. Theoretically.  
**Sheppard**: Like "dinosaurs turned into birds" theoretically or "theory of relativity" theoretically?  
**McKay**[_looks confused_ What? Um, somewhere between.

**24. ****McKay**: I'm picking up a strange reading from right over there.  
**Sheppard**: Define strange.  
**McKay**[_pause_ You don't know what strange means?

**25. ****Ronon**[_after Sheppard, Teyla, Rodney, and Ronon are held captive, Ronon is trying to get out of his hand restraints_ I think they're loosening.  
**Sheppard**: Watch it, Chewie. You're gonna cut your damn hands off!

**26. ****McKay**: There's no sign of any settlements - at least, nothing recent.   
**Ronon**[_pointing_ Other than the smoke from that campfire.  
**McKay**: Ah. Yes, well, other than that.

**27. ****Teyla**: What do you want from us?  
**Torrell**: Well, we've already got your weapons. Now I do believe we'll take your ship. You see, we have been planning a little trip to the mainland, but after seeing you fly that thing through the Ancestral Ring...  
**McKay**: If you're referring to the ship you just shot down, the one that doesn't stand a hope in hell of ever flying again...  
**Torrell**: The ship that you're gonna fix, yes.  
**McKay**: What am I, MacGyver? Fix it with what?

**28. ****Ronon**: Well, eventually I will get free and when I do, he's gonna pay for this.  
**Sheppard**: Now listen to me. When you get free, you get us free and we all get out of here. Let 'em find out we're gone after we're gone.  
**Ronon**: You're expecting me to let them get away with this?  
**Sheppard**: The operative words are "get away".  
**Ronon**: After I kill them.  
**Sheppard**: That type of thinking will get us killed. 

**29. ****Ronon**: Well, if you had returned fire...  
**Sheppard**: The weapons systems were damaged.  
**Ronon**: If you say so.  
**Sheppard**: I do say so, and right now I'm saying knock it off.  
**Ronon**: Is that an order, Sheppard?  
**Sheppard**: I am beat up, tied up, and couldn't order a pizza right now if I wanted to. But if you need it to be, yeah - it's an order.  
**Ronon**: Okay.

**30. ****McKay**[_seeing a security escort of only two marines_ Whoa, whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa. What is this? This is my security escort?  
**Weir**: Well, we are spread a little bit thin right now.  
**McKay**: OK.  
[_to the marines_  
**McKay**: You need to know that if we come under fire, you're gonna have to put your lives on the line to protect me.  
**Weir**: Rodney!  
**McKay**: OK, I mean the Zed-PM. You need to protect the Zed-PM at all costs... and me.

**31. ****McKay**[_facing a wraith guard_ So! This is how it's gonna be, huh? Just me?  
**McKay**[_seeing another Wraith guard come up_ OK! That's just fine!   
**McKay**[_he draws his pistol and points it at them, grinning in bravado_   
**McKay**: You want some of this, huh? Huh?  
**McKay**[_as he goes to fire his pistol, he presses the wrong part of the gun and the magazine ejects and drops to the floor_

**32. ****Weir**: How much time do you need?  
**McKay**: Oh, well...  
**Zelenka**: ...a week...  
**McKay**: ...a couple of hours.  
**Weir**: I'll take the second estimate. Go.

**33. ****Ford**[_looking at Wraith called Steve_ You know, he looks kinda peaceful...  
**Beckett**[_outraged about having to take its blood_ Peaceful? You're out of your bloody mind!

**34. ****McKay**[_after injecting himself with Wraith enzyme and beating up two guards_ And that's what happens when you back a brilliant scientist into a corner

**35. ****Sheppard**: Two heads think better than one.  
**McKay**: That's a common misconception.  
** Sheppard**: Just give me a gun so I can shoot him

**36. ****Neera**: The Wraith will not allow us to escape.  
**Sheppard**: Yeah, well, I try not to let them tell me what I can and can't do.   
**Neera**[_surprised_ You do not fear them?  
**Sheppard**: The Wraith? Naah. Now clowns - that's another story. Scare the crap out of me.

**37. ****Neera**: You have fought the Wraith before?  
**Sheppard**: Lots of times. Won some battles, lost some. War's not over by a long shot, but we're managing to hold our own.  
**38.** **Neera**: And the clowns?  
**Sheppard**: The clowns? Oh, yeah, the clowns... we fight them too. Entire armies, spilling out of Volkswagens. We do our best to fight them off, but they keep sending 'em in.

**39. ****Sheppard**: Did Ronan shoot me?  
**Weir**: You had it coming

**40. **[_McKay buttons up his collar while entering the cave with the Iratus bugs_   
**Beckett**: You don't seriously think that's gonna help?  
**McKay**: When they see your neck before they see mine, you won't think it's stupid.  
[_several minutes later, Beckett lifts up his collar before trying to harvest the eggs_  
**McKay**: See! Not so stupid!  
**Carson Beckett M. D.**: Ah, shut up.

**41. **[_about an adolescent Wraith_  
**Sheppard**: So it's a teenage things. Pimples, rebellion, life sucking.  
**Beckett**: Something like that.

**42. **[_explaining an energy weapon to Sheppard_  
**McKay**: The sticking point is that, ah, there is no tie between the power generator and the primary capacitor.  
**Zelenka**: Meaning that they would have to channel the power directly into the weapon.  
**Rodney McKay**: Which I'm sure that means nothing to you.  
**Sheppard**: It means they could fire multiple bursts without having to store more power for the next firing sequence.  
**McKay**: Yes... very good.  
**Sheppard**: Which leads me back to 'cool'!

**43. ****McKay**: I'm not crazy. I just have another consciousness in my brain.   
**Sheppard**: So he just looks crazy.  
**McKay**: I'm sure I do, but only because Dr. Fumbles McStupid over here was in way over his head!

**44. ****Weir**: You think once the initial shock is over, we'll have the old Rodney back?  
**Beckett**: I'm afraid so.

**45. ****McKay**[_about radiation exposure_ As it is, I may have to forgo reproducing.  
** Lorne**: Yeah, that's funny, I was just thinking that might be wise.

**46. ****McKay**[_whispering_ I don't think they've detected us.  
**Weir**[_whispering too_ Why are you whispering?  
**McKay**[_still whispering_ I dunno. It just seems like the right thing to do.

**47. ****Sheppard**: This is what I do when I have problems with my laptop, I turn it off and then I... turn it on again.  
**Weir**: I think this is a little bit more complicated than that.  
**48.** **Sheppard**: I'm just saying that if we're taking a page from the John Sheppard book of computer repair, we're really desperate.

**Beckett**: You have a date, Rodney? With a woman?  
**McKay**: It is simply two adults sharing some friendly... Yes, with a woman!

**49. ****Weir**: How are you?  
**Sheppard**: Oh, I'm mutating into a bug. How are you?

**50. ****Caldwell**[_over radio_ Dr. McKay, What's your status?  
**Teyla: ** Dr. McKay is... not here.  
**Caldwell**: What?  
**Teyla**: He had to ...  
**Ronon**: He had to check something on the Wraith pod.  
**Teyla**: Yes, the Wraith pod. He had to check the... biometrics receiver, needed to reconfirm the frequencies of the normal feedback loop.   
**Caldwell**: Why isn't he on his radio?  
**Teyla**: Well, actually we have been having trouble reaching him ourselves. I think it may have something to do with... interference from the um... magnetic shielding of the pods.  
**Ronon**[_sardonically_ Yeah, shielding.  
**Teyla**: Ronon was just about to check on him, see what is taking him so long.   
**Caldwell**: All right go get him, light a fire under him.  
**Teyla**: Right away.  
**Caldwell**: And I want a status report as soon as his radio is working. Caldwell out.  
**Ronon**[_to Teyla_ Nice stalling.


	2. 51 to 100

**51. ****McKay**: You see, the thing is, Col. Sheppard and I have sorta gotten into this habit of saving each others' lives and it's my turn.  
[_pause_   
**Dr. Rodney McKay**: It can be your turn next.

**52.** [_Sheppard and McKay whisper while spying on a Wraith in disguise_   
**Sheppard**: That's her!  
**McKay**: That's the Wraith?  
**Sheppard**: Yeah.  
**McKay**: Wow... She's hot! I mean seriously hot!  
**Sheppard**: Rodney, you're drooling over a Wraith!  
**McKay**: I know, I... disgust myself sometimes.

**53. ****Sheppard**: R2, I need you to turn the auto pilot off.

**54. ****McKay**: 95 of deadly is still deadly!

**55. ****McKay**: I'm not sure I can fix this.  
**Grodin**: You can fix anything.  
**McKay**: Who told you that?  
**Grodin**: You did. On several occasions.

**56. ****Weir**: You were right.  
**Beckett**: Lovely... About what?  
**Weir**: Your theory of the Wraith evolving after the Ancients arrived in the Pegasus Galaxy.  
**McKay**: You've got to be kidding me.  
**Zelenka**: Pay up!

**57. ****Ford**: How could something as big as Atlantis just sink?  
**Sheppard**: I'm sure the passengers on the Titanic were asking themselves the same thing.

**58. ****McKay**: Did I mention that I know almost everything about almost everything?

**59. **_[about McKay_  
**Daniel Jackson**: He's Canadian.  
**Jack O'Neill**: I'm sorry.

**60. ****Beckett**: What do I say?  
**Ford**[_looks up from camera_ I dunno... how about "Wish you were here" ?  
**Beckett**[_looking around, turns on Ford_ I wish who was here?  
**Ford**: I dunno. Who do you wish was here?  
**Beckett**: No-one! I wish I wasn't bloody here!

**61. ****Beckett**: ...well if I've learned one thing, Mum, it's that we Earthlings are ver...  
**Ford**: Doc! You can't say that!  
**Beckett**: What?  
**Ford**: Earthlings. It's compromising security!  
**Beckett**: She knows I'm from Earth, son! It's not a bloody secret!

**62. ****McKay**: Let's not be too quick to exclude the possibility that the woman might be, uh... what is the clinical term? "nuts"?

**63. ****McKay**: Well, assuming that we're still alive, and there doesn't appear to be any damage as a result of the pulse, I think we can safely conclude that, uh... um...  
[_long pause_  
**McKay**: I got nothing. I mean I've got nothing to conclude, I was just... talking for the sake of talking.  
**Sheppard**: You sure you're ok?  
**McKay**: You know how much I hate certain death?

**64. ****Beckett **[_sighs_ We believe ATA or Ancient Technology Activation is caused by a single gene that's always on. Instructing various cells in the body to produce a series of proteins and enzymes  
[_McKay is staring at syringe_   
**Beckett**: that interact with the skin, the nervous system and the brain. In this case we're using a mouse retrovirus to deliver the missing gene to your cells.  
**McKay**[_Looking worried_ A mouse retrovirus?  
**Beckett**: It's been deactivated.  
**McKay**: Well, are there any side effects?  
**Beckett**: Dry mouth, headache, the irresistible urge to run in a small wheel...

**65. **[_Sheppard is giving McKay flying lessons, and they get into an argument_   
**Sheppard**: This is why parents get someone else to teach their kids how to drive.  
**McKay**: I'm both insulted and touched by that.

**66. ****Sheppard**: "Get as far away from the nuclear explosion as possible." That's good advice, Rodney, thanks.

**67. **[_Sheppard and McKay have gotten lost finding their way back to the Genii's village_  
**McKay**: They were very clear which route to take.  
**Sheppard**: I prefer a straight line...  
**McKay**: Yes, of course, cause everything's a short cut in Sheppard's world

**68. ****Weir**: Rodney - you can take the rest of the day off.  
**McKay**[_lies down onto the floor on his back with his eyes closed and his hands folded on his chest_ Oh. I am gonna curl up in bed with the largest sandwich I can find.

**69. ****Weir**[_over comms_ Rodney, we need a shield up in forty seconds or we're dead!  
**McKay**: What, are you kidding me?  
**Weir**: No!  
**McKay**: 'Cause I can't help but thinking we're reaching the point at which I completely snap.  
**Weir**: Rodney!  
**McKay**: That should do it! Fire it up.  
**Weir**: That didn't do it.  
**McKay**: What?  
**Teyla**: It is not working.  
**McKay**: I know what she said!  
**Weir**: Twenty seconds!  
**McKay**: OK, snap! That's it! You all happy now?

**70. ****Sheppard**: How's it coming, Rodney?  
**McKay**: Slower than I expected, but faster than humanly possible.

**71. ****Sheppard**: Well, leave it to convicts to know the best way to tie people up.

**73. ****Teyla**: Do you kill all your violent criminals on Earth?  
**McKay**: Certain countries, yes.  
**Sheppard**: Do we need to get into this right now?

**74. ****Marin**: The island is a penal colony. The prisoners usually don't cause much trouble, as long as you don't try to land there.  
**McKay**: Well, you could put up a sign!

**75. ****McKay**: I'm sorry, medicine is about as much of a science as... oh, I don't know, voodoo?

**76. Sheppard:** (to the Wraith Queen) So we have to do everything?!  
(the Queen doesn't reply)  
**McKay:** Okay, okay. I will figure something out. (to the Queen) But no more holding back. I wanna know everything there is to know about hive ships: schematics, power distribution, life support configurations, everything you've got.  
**Hive Queen:** Then you shall have it.  
**McKay:** For real?

**77. Wraith:** How long for the gas to take effect?  
**Beckett:** Well, theoretically...  
**Zelenka: **...we don't know. (Carson throws him a look) Well, we don't.  
**Beckett:** He's right. We don't.

**78. McKay:** (over the radio, to a Wraith) This is Doctor Rodney McKay aboard the Earth ship Daedalus. We would like... uh... with your permission, to begin attempting to beam an innocuous canister onto your ship while you are actively jamming. Uh, we're hoping through trial and error that we can... slowly... disarm or, uh, break the code. May we proceed?  
**Wraith:** You may begin, Doctor McKay.  
**McKay:** Okay! Thank you. Thank you. (off the radio) That was weird

**79. Beckett:** (to a Wraith) Aside from a slight refinement since we last used it on, uh, well, on the one we called Michael... Do you have names? What shall I call you? What shall I call him? Well, I suppose in the end it really doesn't matter, does it? Okay, uh... Where was I?

**80. Sheppard:** You didn't have a plan. You just wanted me dead.  
**Weir:** Still do. As a matter of fact, I can't wait to see that look of defeat on your face, just one last time.  
**Sheppard:** You mean the look on my face when you rammed my fighter, making sure neither one of us would win? That was hatred, not defeat, Phebus.  
**Weir:** Is that any way to talk to your wife? Thalen? Run all you like. The moment I find you, you die.  
**Beckett:** (about this display of affection) Well ... they're headin' straight for divorce.

**81**. **McKay:** (after Weir and Sheppard tried to kill each other) You two need some very serious marriage counseling.

**82. Rodney:** We make a good team, you and I.  
**Carter:** Sure...  
**Rodney:** No, no I mean it. I really enjoy working with you, always have.  
(Carter nods)  
**Rodney:** I wonder... I wonder why we never... hooked up?  
**Carter:** Well aside from the fact that you're petty, arrogant and treat people badly?  
**Rodney:** ...Yes?  
**Carter:** No, that's pretty much it. Petty, arrogant, bad with people.

**83. Carter:** Why else would I be here?  
**McKay:** I don't know! Maybe one last romp before I die.  
**Carter:** One last romp?! Please, we never ...  
**McKay:** Okay, one first romp, but it's romping that comes to mind, not your brains, blondie. Now, you've gotta admit, I am a handsome man standing ...  
**Carter:** You're essentially arguing with yourself. You realize that, right?

**84. Zelenka:** (cursing in Czech): Do prdele, to je na hovno tohle to. Kdo to vymyslel, že budeme pod vodou, tentokrát...? (("For cryin' out loud" This sucks. We're gonna be under water this time - whose idea was that?))  
**Sheppard:** I think my Czech's getting better, 'cause I know what you mean.

**85. Landry:** I thought you said the Daedalus was too far away for our transmitter to reach.  
**Lee:** It is, which is why we have to get closer. P4M-399, it's a, it's a tiny little planet right on the very outskirts of our galaxy, but if we can send a science team there through the Gate, they should be close enough to relay the information to the Daedalus and then they can -- it's, it's, it's like the Twilight Bark...(blank stares from the rest of the room)...Twilight Bark? Hundred and One Dalmations? Didn't you guys see that movie? My kids love it. Any-- well ok, so there's all these dogs and one barks here, one barks here, one -- they, they, they send a message across the countryside...(silence)...Lord of the Rings. (everyone begins to nod in collective understanding) Lord of the Rings, you know when they light all those signal fires on the mountaintops. You saw that, right? So ok.

**89. John:** Doc...  
(he sees Ronon standing over the unconscious Dr. Kavanaugh)  
**John:** What did you do to him?  
**Ronon:** Nothing, he fainted before I could touch him.

**90. Weir:** What is this probe of yours supposed to do?  
**McKay:** Well, it's supposed to descend slowly into the atmosphere of a gas giant. The chute opens, the probe separates into two components joined by a tether hundreds of metres long.  
**Weir:** So we should be able to receive telemetry from inside the time dilation field while the other half of the probe is still outside.  
**McKay:** Right. And depending on the variance, we might be able to fly right into the field and rescue Sheppard.  
**Beckett:** Very clever, Rodney!  
**McKay:** Uh, yes, it is. It was actually Zelenka's idea.

**91. Sheppard:** (Hearing a ferocious roar and being very hungry) Well, you're either gonna eat me, or I'm gonna eat you.

**92. Sheppard:** (Teer is bringing him breakfast) You know, you don't have to do this for me every morning.  
**Teer:** You saved my brother's life.  
**Sheppard:** Then shouldn't he be the one bringing me breakfast?!

**93. McKay:** (to Beckett) Jealous that I get all the women and you don't?

**94. McKay:** I'm itchy. I'm itchy all over. This is exactly what happened when I took pot once in college!

**95. Weir:** I take it that's not how you prefer to do things.  
**Ronon:** No. I'm leaving.  
**Weir:** Hey Ronon, wait. Just because we do things differently doesn't mean we can't learn from each other. And Col. Sheppard has already invested an incredible amount of time and energy trying to make you an integral part of his team.  
**Ronon:** I meant 'I'm leaving the table.'  
**Weir:** Oh...  
**Ronon:** Is that okay?

**96. Sheppard:** Any way to figure out what they're saying?  
**McKay:** Yes, of course, it says right here – "Why is the smart one having to stop and answer so many questions?"

**97.** [On talking about the second test with Atlantis  
**McKay:** Radek?  
**Zelenka:** Rodney?  
**McKay:** Okay, we've been over this. I'm doing this manually, at half power. It's a cake walk!  
**Zelenka:** I don't think it matters how much cake you walk on. I've been doing calculations of my own…

**98. McKay:** What are you...oh my God, he's tasting it! You don't know what that is -- that could be their laundry!  
**Ronon:** (sampling stew) Very good!  
**McKay:** Oh yes, good idea! And when you're finished with their porridge, why don't we try their beds, hmm?  
**Ronon: **(to Teyla) Want some?  
**McKay:** How good is it?  
**Sheppard:** Leave it be, Goldilocks.

**99. Torrell:** You'll figure it out.  
**McKay:** And if I don't?  
**Torrell:** Well, I could kill you. But you strike me as the type of man who, despite being weak and cowardly on the outside, harbours a strength of character he doesn't even know he has.  
**McKay:** I'm sorry - was there a compliment in there?

**100. Sheppard: **I come from a galaxy far, far away.

**101.** Bonus Nerd One

**Zelenka**_Na dně moře máme „fail safe" , mechanizmus. Obrovskou silou vytrhl kotvu města ze dna oceánu. My jsme.. Zhrozili jsme jsme.. Zhrozili jsme se. Neuveřitelný, co se to děje a ten hluk; celé město se třáslo jako při zemětřesení. To bylo něco neuvěritelnýho. A najednou... se hneme. Celé město stoupalo. Stoupalo nahoru, nahoru k hladině. To, to bylo něco neuveřitelnýho a a a a a věže prorazily hladinu a vyjeli jsme nahoru nahoru a vody, vlny, vodopády, všechno teče z těch vejšek. A my... vystřelili jsme nahoru, úplně, úplně na vršek.. Slunce... Sluníčko, prostě... proudilo do všech oken. Do smrti, do smrti na to nezapomenu._:  
On the bottom of the sea we have a failsafe mechanism. It pulled up the anchor of the city from the bottom of the sea with great force. We... we were... we were scared. That was incredible, what happened? And that noise. The whole city was shaking, it was like an earthquake. That was so incredible. And then we were moving. The whole city was rising. It was rising up, rising up to the ocean surface. It was, it was really incredible and the towers broke through the surface. We were going up. Water, waves, waterfalls were falling down from the heights. And we... we were shot up, right to the top. Sun... just shine... It was shining through all the windows. I'll remember it for the rest of my life... for the rest of my life.  
- _Drž se, miláčku._: Take care, honey.

**I just h****ad to put that in there.**


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